The New NBA All-Star Game Format Stinks
The NBA announced a new format for the All-Star Game today, with the changes in effect this year during the 69th (nice) All Star Game in Chicago.. It is confusing as hell.
First off, let’s start with the good changes. The game will now be played for the charity of the team captain’s choosing and the game has an added tie-in honoring the late Kobe Bryant (more on that later). Everyone can agree that both of those additions to the game are great; however, the format of the game is a big ole’ mess:
Every quarter of the game will serve as a “mini-game” with the score resetting at the start of each quarter.
The team with the most points at the end of each quarter will win $100,000 for their team’s charity.
At the beginning of the 4th quarter, each team’s previous scores from the first 3 quarters will be combined.
Then you add 24 points (this is the Kobe tribute) to the team with the most points to get a “target score”.
After the target score is determined, both teams will play an untimed fourth quarter - with the first to hit the “target score” winning the game and $200,000 for their charity of choice.
Math majors rejoice and bust out those TI-83’s! You can finally add value to a watch party that you still won’t be invited to.
Anyways, the changes are pretty lackluster and confusing to say the least. I think the only thing NBA fans want to do less than watching 1 All Star Game is watching 4 consecutive All Star Games. Here are a few ways I think we can spice up the All Star Game that don’t require an abacus:
Stream NBA All-Stars playing actual mini games in Mario Party.
Live feed of each All Star taking the Wonderlic test, with the questions comprised solely of math problems relating to the new All Star Game scoring format.
Reform the Milwaukee Beers and have the All-Star team face off against them in a game of BASEketball.
Throw Marcus Morris in a dunk tank and let each member of the WNBA throw a pitch..
Stream this video of Kobe Bryant eviscerating Jason Whitlock